


as long as you’re all here, i'll be okay

by kaktusen



Category: One Piece
Genre: Fluff and Angst, Hurt/Comfort, I Wrote This Instead of Sleeping, Implied/Referenced Character Death, Nightmares, Not Beta Read, Post-Time Skip, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Trauma, We Die Like Men, ace is just mentioned, give this boy a hug, i guess, luffy just needs reassurance okaY
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-28
Updated: 2020-09-28
Packaged: 2021-03-07 18:21:06
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,882
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26692096
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kaktusen/pseuds/kaktusen
Summary: A boy with a straw hat sits cross legged on the lion figurehead with his eyes closed, feeling the sun on his skin, smelling the salty ocean smell, listening to the waves below and the birds singing above.A memory of a bloody battlefield crawls into his mind, interrupting his peacefulness and he falls back.(or Luffy is traumatized and needs reassurance that his crewmates are alive, here and well)
Relationships: Monkey D. Luffy & Mugiwara Kaizoku | Strawhat Pirates
Comments: 3
Kudos: 110





	as long as you’re all here, i'll be okay

**Author's Note:**

> hello! i havent finished a fanfic/oneshot in a wHILE damn
> 
> anyways this is something that has been in my mind for a long time, after everything luffy went through when being separated, wouldn't he feel at least sOMETHING about needing to check if his members are actually real and here?? idk my angst loving brain have been feeding on this idea for so long i thought i'd share it
> 
> i'm not the best writer but my dramatic ass did her best so i hope yall like it!
> 
> also english isn't my first language so if you see a grammatical error or spelling error, please inform me! <3
> 
> edit dec 11, 2020: just fixed some grammar, typos and a small edit of the title
> 
> hope you enjoy!

A large boat with a lion-shaped figurehead sailed on the sea, water splashing against the wood. It was a calm day, the only sound was the wind blowing into the sails, making the black pirate flags flutter. 

On the figurehead sat a boy with a straw hat hanging around his neck and a big scar on his chest. The wind making his hair look crazier and more tangled than usual. He sits cross legged with his eyes closed, feeling the sun on his skin, smelling the salty ocean smell, listening to the waves below and the birds singing above. 

A memory of a bloody battlefield crawls into his mind, interrupting his peacefulness and he opens his eyes. He hadn’t slept well that night. Images of corpses and battles flowed into his mind every time he closed his eyes and nightmares of poison burning in his veins, screams, gunshots and swords clashing and slashing plaguing him over and over whenever he fell asleep, making him wake up soon after in a puddle of his own sweat. But the worst ones, the ones he couldn't stand, were hearing the people most precious to him desperately scream his name before disappearing right in front of him and the feeling of a heavy body slumping against him, blood dripping down and pooling around them. He laid awake for hours, feeling cold, alone and hopeless, just as he had felt those days after the war, it was agonizing. 

Eventually he decided that good sleep was impossible that night, so he laid awake, listening to the snores and sleepfilled mumbles of his crewmates. He eventually got up from his hammock when the sun rose, stepping outside, feeling the cool morning breeze.

At breakfast and lunch he was his usual happy, food-stealing self, his crewmates being awake and lively around him bringing him comfort. But when lunch was over, they all set out to do their own thing on the ship and the comforting feeling slowly slipped away from him.

He thought maybe sitting in his favorite spot, listening to his favorite sounds would help fight off the memories. It did, for a while but inevitably they creeped back into his mind. He suddenly got a feeling that it was too quiet around him, too cold and empty. He whirled around and jumped off the figure head and onto the upper deck. His hands were shaking and his eyes wildly searched for any sign of his crewmates, his nakama, his family.

The first person Luffy sees is Nami, on the other side of the boat, tending to her mikan bushes. He felt a little relief wash over him but he soon stiffened when a thought forced it's way into his head, _is she just a hallucination_ ? She’s a little too far away for his brain to comfortably tell if she was actually there or if his mind was playing tricks on him. He hurried down the stairs to get to the other side of the ship, not really wanting to use his powers just to grab at nothing because _he didn’t know if anything was real anymore_. In his hurry he barely noticed the two sleeping figures on the grass of the main deck.

He got to the other side and could hear Nami’s soft humming, he hurriedly climbed up to the garden finally using his powers because _he needed to get up there as soon as possible_. He landed on the floor and Nami stopped her humming to look at him.

“Luffy? You can’t have any mikans- Are you okay?” She stopped mid sentence when she noticed his frazzled state. Luffy didn’t answer, instead he reached out to touch Nami’s arm, right underneath her tattoo. What met him wasn't him grabbing into thin air, but soft, warm skin. _She was real_. A little of the tension seeped out from him and his shoulders relaxed and he let go of her. 

“Yeah.” He grinned at her and then turned around and jumped down to the deck beneath them. Now he just needed to check on everyone else.  
  
Nami was left standing there in confusion, then subtle realization and she went back to tending to her mikans, making sure to pick the best one she could find to later give to Luffy.

As Luffy was making his way to the galley to check on Sanji, he finally noticed the two figures on the main deck. Zoro sat on the grass, arms crossed over his chest and swords laying beside him. Chopper leaning snugly against him, both of them napping in the sunshine. Luffy glanced to the galley door and then to the sleeping duo and decided to check on them first. He jumped down onto the grass and walked up to them, patting them both on the head, just to make sure they were _real_ . Zoro’s grass colored hair was soft and Chopper’s big hat was squishy. Luffy smiled at them and then straightened up to go to the galley, not noticing Zoro cracking his eye open to watch his captain. When Luffy went into the galley, Zoro closed his eye again and smiled slightly. ‘ _Whatever reassures you, captain_ ’ he thought to himself.

Luffy walked into the galley, Sanji looking up from his notepad when the door closed. The fridge was open, Sanji clearly checking inventory to see what they need to stock up on when they get to the next island. Brook was having tea by the dinner table, being in a break from his and Sanji’s conversation.

“Dinner isn’t until later Luffy, but if you want I can make a snack for you?” Sanji said, looking down on his notepad again, taking note of how... calm Luffy seemed.

“No need for that yet.” Luffy answered shortly while he walked towards the kitchen, Sanji looked back up again with a surprised look on his face. Luffy being this calm was unusual, but him also saying no to food was even more unusual. Luffy rounded the kitchen island that stuck out from the wall, just to lightly grab Sanji’s shoulder, and then let go. He then made his way towards Brook, whose arm he touched and then left the galley through the back door.

Sanji and Brook just gaped and looked from the door and then to each other, Sanji’s cigarette almost falling out of his mouth.

“What-” Brook started, until realization hit him. “Ah.” Was all he said. Brook had experienced a similar thing when he had joined the Strawhats and they had set sail from Thriller Bark. The memories of his old crew dying around him had resurfaced and for a while he subtly walked around the ship just to see everyone alive and well. Brook brought the cup of tea up to his mouth and took a sip. Sanji, realizing soon after Brook, started preparing meat snacks for Luffy to enjoy later, when he had an appetite for it.

Luffy had gone out to the rear of the Sunny-go, his haki activated to look for the next member. He climbed up the ladder to the library to find, just as he expected, Robin there, calmly reading a book. She looked up from the book, over her reading glasses that were perched on her nose to smile at him. 

“Hello captain, did you want something?” She said in a kind voice. He just shook his head and sat down on the floor beside where Robin was sitting on the couch. Back leaning against it, his shoulder barely touching Robin’s leg. A hand settled in Luffy's messy hair, making warmth grow inside of him, reassuring him that Robin was there. They sat there, no one speaking a sound and eventually Luffy decided it was time for him to leave so he properly touched Robin’s leg by giving it a nudge and then left, Robin gazing after him with a slight smile on her face.

Luffy stepped back onto the rear deck of the Sunny and headed to where he knew the last two people were, down into the part of the ship where the two crafters spent most of their time. He climbed inside to see Franky and Usopp hunched over, working on something together. The sound of tinkering and hammering filled the co-joined “factories”, as they called them. Usopp looked up when he heard someone approaching.

“Ah, Luffy!” He exclaimed. “Look at what we’re working on!” Usopp moved aside so Luffy could see what they were making. It looked like it could be the start of a new kind of waver. 

“We’re thinking we’re gonna make it shoot lasers or something from the mouth like Sunny’s gaon cannon!” Franky said excitedly. Luffy’s eyes started glowing a little more than they had previously, not being able to help being excited over something so cool when he had started feeling better after checking in on everyone.  
“Woah, that’s gonna be so cool!” He said, not as excitedly as he would a normal day, but more than he would’ve earlier that day. He put his hands on each of their shoulders closest to him to lean in to look at it closer, and to touch the last two members of his _family_.

“Right!” Usopp said proudly and rubbed his nose.

Luffy stayed with Usopp and Franky for a little after that until he eventually left to go sit on Sunny’s figurehead again. He sat down, feeling warmer and much better than he had that morning.  
  
Time passed and it was nearing dinner time. The sun had started to set slightly and the sky was slowly turning pinker. He suddenly felt a presence near and he turned around to look behind him. There, stood his whole crew, Sanji with a huge platter of a bunch of different meat based foods (and another platter with food for the other members too), Nami with a basket of the best mikans from her garden and the rest of the crew with their reassuring comfort.

“Let’s all have dinner here.” Sanji said and sat down the platters of food onto the deck, where someone had put down a big blanket. The warmth of love and happiness surged through Luffy and all of the bad memories and thoughts disappeared like vapor. He grinned his biggest grin at them and jumped up and then down onto the deck, plopping down onto the blanket along with everyone else. 

They ate, talked and laughed all evening. Brook playing music that filled everyone with joy, Usopp, Franky and Chopper dancing the silliest dances that made Luffy laugh so hard he cried, Sanji’s food filling everyone up until they couldn't dare to even touch any more food, the sound of Zoro and Robin’s rare laughter vibrating in the planks beneath them, the scent of Nami’s mikans mixed with her perfume wafting through the air. It all felt so right. Luffy was warm, content and so incredibly _happy_ .  
  
Yes, he misses his brother. He misses him _so_ much his heart aches. 

But he knows that Ace wouldn't want him to give up on everything.

He knows that his crew would support him, whatever may happen.

He knows his whole crew was there, alive and well. His nakama. His family.

He knows that, as long as they’re all here with him, he'll be okay.

**Author's Note:**

> thank you all so much for reading!  
> i hope you all liked it, please leave a kudos and a comment if you did! <3


End file.
